Sinzalot: Moving Day!

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Deep Sea Pygmy Tickling...

A Brief History...

Deep sea pygmy tickling is an very old and very dangerous critter sport. It's original purpose was as a 'right of passage' for critters into the workhouses of the human world. Candidates were required to tickle the pygmy (traditionally the Japanese fighting variety...the most aggressive) until it changed colour.

Earliest records indicate that a light shade of lavender lava would be sufficient for the candidate to pass. Also note that tickling a pygmy does not make them laugh, in fact the opposite occurs and as the subjects rage increases, colour changes occur. After the incident at the 1805 ‘slap ‘n’ dash’ championships, where over 200 critter spectators lost there ears it was noted that no pygmy should ever be tickled to a colour of mental mauve. Research was conducted and found that as long as the pygmy was kept wet (sprinkler failure, 1871) and tournaments staged below sea level (after the Everest incident in 1931), this high pitched, explosive colour could not be achieved.

Today 'tickling' is more of a pastime, Peruvian floating mini-pygmies are now used, and all tickling performed at a safety depth of at least 100 ft to ensure constant wetness. The challenge these days is to go as deep as possible whilst still trying to get your pygmy a nice shade of pulsating purple.

Underground bare-knuckle tickling has been reportedly on the increase.

No pygmies were harmed in the making up of this story.

Thursday, 29 December 2011

Moving Day!

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